Twice Cursed Read online

  For months, the nightmare of disease went hand-in-hand with the worry of who would be next. Fear overwhelmed the community of Weres. The pathogen spread quickly, for the most part only affecting their males. However, once the virus spread to Rissa and her unborn child, the news triggered widespread panic.

  Sean and his hunters had no choice but to eliminate anyone or anything infected with the virus, regardless of status or relationship. While they battled pandemonium, doctors at Leighton Research had raced to find a cure for the lethal contagion. A cure, they had ironically found in Lily’s blood.

  The room where she and Rissa waited was full of warmth—its soft colors and comfortable furniture making it a place to curl up and just unwind. Rissa’s idea to wait in here tonight was a nice try, but right now, even a hot tub filled with rose scented water and a trained masseuse rubbing her shoulders wouldn’t stifle Lily’s urge to pace. Or punch someone.

  She walked over to the window, and gently pushed the delicate curtains away from the paned glass to peer across the frozen landscape. Smoke circled lazily out of the four chimneys edging the corners of the manor where Sean was deep into discussion.

  The house and the view were picturesque, fitting into the wintertime landscape, despite the sheer size of the imposing structure. The Were compound sat majestically along the rocky Maine coast, and was comprised of a few such core buildings, each one assigned to a particular purpose.

  As Lily gazed out at the manor’s gabled peaks and large, paned windows, it wasn’t hard to imagine the House of the Seven Gables from the infamous Salem witch trials, or parallel the themes of guilt, revenge, and punishment present in Nathaniel Hawthorne’s book by the same name. The same themes Edward Parr now wove like threads into a supernatural web—a trap for Sean—with Parr sitting dead center like a spider in wait.

  Was it just a month ago she had waited with Sean, her hopes high and her heart full as he’d led her into the great hall and the blood rites ritual that would have sealed her acceptance into their pack, into their world?

  She had stood with him at the base of the rosewood staircase, one hand on the balustrade, and the other around his waist, as both had waited for the ceremony to begin.

  She remembered the sumptuous rooms, each with soaring ceilings and intricate woodwork. But, it was the thick set of wooden double doors at the entrance to the Great Hall she recalled most. Elaborately carved, they stood sentinel-like, each side depicting scenes from the Were’s long and complicated history. On the other side of those doors, banners and tapestries lined the walls adding to the majesty of the place, and the sheer history they manifested inspired awe, filling Lily with an otherworldly sense.

  The manor was as much a fortress as the CIA headquarters at Langley, and just as outfitted with every technological advance—yet the feel of it belonging to another place and time hadn’t suffered from it. The upper level housed the war room, but Sean had told her there had been no real need for a gathering in over a century.

  Until now.

  From her place at the window in the main house, she watched the smoke curl, silently wishing there was a message from Sean hidden in the wispy swirls. Black smoke…no. White smoke…yes. Like when the Vatican elects a new Pope.

  With a sigh, she tucked the curtain back in its place. “It’s been too long, Rissa. Something’s not right, I can feel it.”

  With a raised eyebrow, the extremely pregnant woman looked up from her knitting. “What do you mean, you feel it?”

  Lily’s lips curled into half a smile as she glanced over her shoulder at her friend’s suspicious face. “Don’t worry; it’s not as if I’ve been listening in or anything.” She turned back to watch the smoke wind its way into a starless sky, disappearing behind heavy clouds obscuring any light. “Besides, Sean made me promise I wouldn’t snoop.”

  Chuckling, Rissa folded the blanket, rolling the yarn and knitting needles carefully before stowing them in her sewing bag. “Well, can you blame him? With your temper and that nasty habit you have of trespassing in people’s heads, he probably figured it was safer this way. These days, between our psychics and our psychotics, it’s sometimes hard to tell the difference.”

  “Hmmph.”

  “Lily, listen to me. Sean is the Alpha Council of the Brethren. The Weres on the Council may be politicians, but they aren’t stupid. They know which side their bread is buttered on, or at least I hope they do. What’s more, Sean’s hunters are with him. That’s not to say he couldn’t take care of things himself if it came down to it. Edward Parr may be a consummate manipulator, but he’s not foolish enough to start something he knows he can’t win. It’s not his style. He’s far too smooth to put himself in a position where he’d have to fight, especially if it means a fair fight.”

  Lily turned away from the window and folded her arms against an invisible chill. “I guess, but what if that’s not his game, Ris? Parr is smooth, but to me that just means slick—and not in a good way. He’s already forced one stalemate, so I can’t help but wonder what else he’s managed to twist his way.”

  With an aggravated sigh, she walked back toward the fire, hoping its warmth would chase her apprehension away along with the waves of hostility buffeting her mind from across the lawn. From the way her stomach churned, it was more likely hot-tempered arguing rather than civilized debate going on behind those closed doors.

  Rissa was right. Edward Parr was a consummate manipulator. The man had effortlessly exploited hundreds of years of rivalry between clans, throwing doubt on Sean’s commitment to the Compound of Weres and his ability to lead. But why? What was his purpose? Sean was the Alpha. He had more than proven his loyalty to his kind, especially over the last few months.

  Sean’s brother, Jerard, had been one of the worst infected with the virus. Deteriorating quickly, until there was nothing of the once swaggering hunter left to save. In his place was a rabid beast, incapable of human cognizance.

  Sean had hunted Jerard for the good of the Compound, regardless of personal emotion. Lily hunted him for revenge, blaming him for the death of her best friend, Terry. It was her bullet that finally killed Jerard, but only after he had mortally wounded her and was about to kill Sean.

  She ran her fingers absently along the scarred grooves hollowed deep into the skin beneath her jugular. The wounds had long since healed, but the memory of the claws that gave them to her remained fresh in her mind. Sean wasn’t the only one that had proven loyalty to the Compound.

  Lily turned her back to the fire and raked a hand through her long, honey colored hair. She liked her new color, despite Sean’s grumblings. He preferred her natural dark chestnut, but with all the waiting around, she needed something to occupy herself. Rissa had suggested a salon day, and Lily jumped at the chance to do something just for kicks. Blondes have more fun, or so they say. Lately, fun was in short supply despite the past month of Were Holiday merrymaking.

  Christmas had come and gone, and so had the January Wolf Moon, and along with it went the last vestiges of harmony and peace. Parr had forced the issue once more about her place within the pack, goading Sean into ending his hard won adjournment over the holidays. The past month of celebrations went by so quickly, and with such hope. Unfortunately all the postponement did was give Parr the chance to wheedle his way through the Council and the community—something he did like an oiled snake.

  Lily exhaled sharply. “The council is only debating because Parr threw doubt into the ring. He wants to force Sean into making me a full Were. What if he convinces them to turn me against my will? Against medical advice? What then? I meant it when I said I’d rather die than allow myself to turn into some kind of crazed beast. I know Jerard was your husband and Sean’s brother, but Rissa, I saw what this pathogen did to him. I was in his head. He had no memory of the man he was or the people he’d killed in his crazed state.”

  Not even Terry. Lily swallowed hard, before continuing. “When he attacked, his brain was like mush, rudimentary at best and ruled by not
hing more than base bloodlust. I won’t allow it. I won’t allow the virus I contracted from his bite, to become active through a forced transformation.”

  Lily caught a shadow of unguarded grief pass across Rissa’s face, disappearing just as quickly before she could say anything else. She knew she had hurt her friend, but it was what it was. Rissa had Mitch now. She had faced what she had to and moved on. Perhaps it was time for Lily to do the same.

  Rissa didn’t say a word. She sat with her eyes trained on her hands, folded over her belly. “Rissa…” Lily began, immediately sorry. But the other woman held up her hand.

  Looking up, she offered Lily weary smile, but its warmth didn’t quite reach her eyes. “I think I’m going to turn in. I’m a little tired.”

  Lily exhaled, inwardly cursing herself and her big mouth. “Don’t leave simply because my brain to mouth filter is malfunctioning. I shouldn’t have brought it up. It’s this waiting. It’s making me crazy.”

  Lily took Rissa’s hand and helped her off the couch. At the simple touch, the woman’s emotions flooded her mind. Her sorrow at losing Jerard, her guilt at finding happiness again with Mitch, worry over the future for her four year-old daughter, Stephanie, and for the new baby she now carried.

  Lily’s hand tightened and her heart clenched.

  “What I think you mean, is that this is making you crazier than usual,” Rissa shot back, rubbing the dull ache lodged in the small of her back. Her gaze softened. “It’s not you, Lil, trust me. I’m truly tired. It’s a wonder I don’t fall asleep where I stand, enormous as I am, and who could blame me?” she said, glancing down at her swollen belly.

  She gave Lily a hug, and picked up her sewing bag. “As for all the rest, well, it is what it is. I need to accept that there was nothing I could do to save Jerard. We weren’t exactly the happiest of couples, but we did love each other in our own way, and I know I have to let what happened go, but sometimes…” Her voice trailed off. “I’m okay, or at least I will be. One day at a time, right?” Looking around the room, she gestured with her hand. “Don’t stay cooped up in here too much longer tonight, huh? You could use some rest yourself.”

  Lily nodded as Rissa closed the door behind her. This whole situation sucked. Two months ago, she’d had a normal life. Then everything had changed. She’d gained, and she had lost. She may have found the love of her life in Sean, but she had lost her best friend. And while she knew she wasn’t responsible for what happened, she wasn’t about to lose Rissa simply because she couldn’t remember to keep her thoughts to herself. What was it Terry used to say? Constipation of the brain, diarrhea of the mouth? Yup. That just about covered it.

  The living room was quiet, except for the sound of the logs crackling on the fire and the hum of her thoughts racing around in her head. Glancing back at the closed door, she frowned, angry with herself again. She was lucky Rissa was the forgiving type. Just like Terry.

  With a sigh, she walked back toward the window. Terry had always been there for her. Now she was dead. Lily’s throat tightened, and she swallowed hard again. No matter how much time passed, she would never quite get over it. Terry was the only one Lily could count on to help her keep her eyes on what mattered most. She had been Lily’s touchstone, the one to force her to see the truth about herself, whether she wanted to or not.

  Lily smiled this time, as she glanced over her shoulder at the door again. Terry would have liked Rissa. They were different personalities, but somehow they both managed to bring out the best in her. Maybe I should try the ‘love is patient, love is kind’ thing too, she thought, half- expecting Terry’s snort of laughter at the idea. Yeah right, that from the person who was the poster girl for shoot first and ask questions later.

  Even as a Shade for a short time after her passing, Terry had been there, conquering death just long enough to force Lily to face her fears, and ultimately her love for Sean. To put aside her guns and her vigilante need for revenge and learn to forgive, starting with herself.

  Lily blinked at the wetness prickling at the corner of her eyes. She hadn’t cried in a long time, and she wasn’t about to now. Only happy tears. That was the last thing Terry had said to her, before moving on and into the light.

  There were those words again…move on. Lily lit a cigarette and took a drag. Blowing smoke through her nose, she flicked the ashes into the fireplace. “We’ll see soon enough, won’t we?” she murmured.

  ***

  Lily rolled onto her side. She cracked one eye open, staring blankly at the window across from her bed. It was well past three a.m., and still no sign that the Council had come to any kind of accord.

  With a sigh, she shoved a pillow beneath her down comforter and wiggled it toward her feet, wedging it between her knees, not that it would help. Sleep just wasn’t going to happen tonight.

  Why had she ever agreed to let Sean handle this alone? She kicked at the duvet, sending the down puffing out around her. Lily had promised she wouldn’t interfere, and as much as she hated to admit it, he honestly hadn’t given her much choice.

  Indomitable was certainly one way to describe Sean Leighton, Alpha Council of the Brethren. As was Mitch Paris, his second in command, and the rest of their team, especially when it came to the women in their lives.

  This situation was unadulterated bullshit, nothing more than pack politics running amok. She stretched out her legs, her feet brushing against the cold edge of the sheets. There was no soft snoring, or wide, warm back to cuddle up against, not with the large wolf that should have occupied the other side of the bed still out playing with the politicians. She shivered, burrowing further down and taking the covers with her. The Alpha’s bed was large and comfortable, but without Sean to fill the emptiness, it was nothing more than vast sea of lonely blankets.

  According to tradition, the Alpha’s word was law, but this situation required more than just an edict. It required finesse, as the notion of the Compound itself, with its elected Alpha, was an anomaly in the supernatural world. Sean held the right of Alpha in his own wolf pack, but the Compound wasn’t just comprised of wolves. Many different species of Were had joined in this unprecedented endeavor, electing Sean to represent all, and gifting him with the abilities of each group.

  If the Compound failed, Were relations would splinter into traditional factions, and any steps taken toward the dream of one cohesive Were State would be lost forever. Even before this viral pandemic, Sean had been on the verge of uniting the normally volatile community of Weres, much to the dismay of some. But in the face of near extinction, even the most discordant factions rallied into the ‘all for one and one for all’ mindset.

  At least that had been the case until Edward Parr had had his fifteen minutes of fame.

  She frowned. Bastard! Parr’s unexpected political maneuvering had not only derailed her acceptance by the pack, but had also succeeded in fracturing the hot-blooded Were community. Not to mention driving a wedge between her and Sean, as if their relationship wasn’t hard enough on its own.

  So what if she was human? She had Were blood in her veins, courtesy of Jerard’s rabid attack. Lucky for her, she was asymptomatic, regardless of cross reactivity to the virus. Even luckier, it seemed her antibodies were the key to curing this mystery illness. That fact alone made the current situation all the more ludicrous.

  A disgusted sigh left Lily’s mouth. If it were up to her, she would have given Parr two shots behind the ear without batting an eye or ruining her mascara. Unfortunately, as tempting as it was, she had to keep her cool. For whatever reason, Sean was trying his hardest to remain politically correct. There was something hidden behind this, or why else would Parr risk such an upheaval? On this point, she couldn’t argue with Sean. The status of her humanity wasn’t a strong enough case to merit all this debate.

  She sighed.

  Enough was enough. Sean had closed the door on their shared mind link, but as the Alpha, he had no other choice. He needed a clear head, especially since Parr would use any
pretext to discredit Sean.

  Chewing on her lower lip, she sent her senses out. It would be so easy, and really, with her skills who would know?

  Weres were a tricky breed to read, but all she needed was one person with their guard down. She had even joked that it was like being the proverbial fly on the wall without all the mess of having to phase.

  Within moments, she found her opening and slid right in. Her vision was hazy, as she hadn’t a clue as to whose eyes she looked through, but an underlying fear radiated from her host like they’d rather be anywhere else but there. Smiling ruefully, the words been there, done that, ran through her mind.

  Sean’s voice rang out above the din, bringing all eyes to him. One leg crossed over the other, his hands rested casually on either arm of the Alpha’s chair. His relaxed pose was in complete contradiction to the tension echoing throughout the room, and Lily guessed it took significant effort on his part to appear that nonchalant.

  “Let’s be reasonable. Every test, every report our lab has generated over the past month states unequivocally that Lily’s blood needs to remain pure. Would you risk everyone’s life for an archaic law? You would risk your own?” His eyes traveled across the room fixing Parr and his allies with an icy stare. “This pathogen affects everyone, or did you think status would be a mitigating factor?”

  Parr stepped forward, his robes swirling in an exaggerated gesture of polite distain. Lily snorted from her vantage. Poser! Couldn’t they see how smarmy he was, despite his polished veneer and practiced words? Were they all genuinely that obtuse they couldn’t see through his theatrics?

  “Once again our illustrious Alpha demonstrates his contempt. What more proof does the council need? Leighton won’t even entertain the idea of turning his human lover, simply because she would rather not. The audacity! Well, I ask you, when did we as a species start putting the wants of humans above ourselves?” Parr raised one hand against the murmurings that stirred.